Tips To Deal With Workplace Harassment

Whenever we plan on a career, we are careful to go through the smallest of details. How it will benefit us? Will it be fruitful in the long run? What most us forget before planning out our professional life is the part where we are supposed to face hardships within it.

Hardships within the professional life require a certain amount of maturity in an individual that enables them in tackling every problem thrown in their way. One of these problems among the many is; work place harassment. Harassment is any act by anyone that may make you uncomfortable in your own skin.

It is everywhere isn’t it? From the second you set your foot outside your house to the second you’re home again, you can be harassed. Sometimes, one is not safe in their own house.

How to Identify Harassment

A person who is being harassed doesn’t need to be told so. They are the ones going through it, they can definitely feel it. If you feel it then it exists.

In your work place, it doesn’t necessarily have to be the opposite gender who does all the dirty work. It can be your colleagues of the same sex. It can be your boss, your secretary, it can even be the security guard outside your office.

There is no particular written list, nor an order. Who might target you can’t be told. It’s also not always females that get targeted, males are harassed just the same, and maybe worse, there is no way to tell.

What NOT To Do

Blame Yourself

No matter what the case was, you should never blame yourself. It was not your fault. It was not your fault that you were polite or friendly with them, if you showed kindness towards them or just smiled at them. You are not at fault for how they are making you feel. It’s not your fault. It’s theirs.

Keep It to Yourself

Never keep a harassment incident to yourself. Trust someone. Let them know the humiliation one feels when something like this happens. The worst thing you can do is to keep it to yourself. Don’t keep it to yourself, tell someone. If you have no one to turn to, scream it out to no one in particular.

Stay the Same

Well that would be just pointless wouldn’t it? If something happens to you or someone does something to you at your office and they’re starting to do it regularly, then it’s time to change your behavior. Give your personality a turn when they repeat that particular action.

What to Do

Value your Self-Respect

Nothing should be more valuable to you than your self-respect. If someone dares make you uncomfortable, say it to them. Take a stand for yourself. You should know better than letting people walk over you.

Have Faith in yourself

If people in your office continue to bother you, be strong enough to work it out of that place. It shouldn’t matter if it’s the boss of your boss who’s teasing you. Have faith in your abilities. If taking a stand for yourself would mean jeopardizing your career, do it. Your job needs your abilities, if you have them, you will land another job, very soon.

Tell Others

Yes, do it. Spread the word in your workplace if you have to, be smart and turn it into a funny or inspirational story that keeps you safe but gets the message across as well. If you have to quit, tell the next you might apply at, the real reason for leaving your last job. It will only earn you more respect. Do it.

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Best Tips To Manage Your Personal & Professional Life

The working woman of Pakistan today is a veritable superhero. Someone who has taken it upon themselves to lead a double life, each with its own intricacies and perks. On one hand there’s the work environment where she has to be the emphatic co-worker, the energetic employee, the tireless organizer. On the other hand when the working hours are over she returns home to adopt the persona of a mother, a wife, a sister. Then the next day the cycle begins again.

Working women do not complain since this is the life they chose to lead. Sometimes stress builds up and the perfect balance between the two positions are interrupted in a flurry of irritation and pressure. There are a lot of ways to avoid that breaking point.Let’s consider some tips to manage personal and professional life.

Low Stress Level

Keep the stress meters low by making sure some of the little things such as being punctual with projects. Set comfortable deadlines for yourself and make sure to take anti-procrastination measures. Not only will it give you a sense of accomplishment but you’ll avoid that ‘last minute hassle’ and ‘deadline dread’  we all come to know so well. Without these in your life you’ll find that it’s much easier to feel relaxed.

Cooperative Co-workers

Make win-win situations with co-workers. Every office has a handful of lovable peeps who are masters of the puppy-dog eyes that lures you on board to do their work for them or help with one little tweak here or there.

Refusing these particular employees seems like a betrayal of their trust – the breaking of a special bond. Instead try to lead them on with the favor and then letting it slide. Do this by casually calling upon them to return the effort on a project that you’re struggling with. Not only does that let you finish your work faster but your co-workers may also feel reluctant calling upon you again if they feel that they actually have to return the favor! Bonus!

No Homework

Never bring work home. This is one of the fundamental rules of balance. Your work life and home life are two different sides on the same coin. Bringing your work home with you not only turns you into a workaholic but you will be unable to enjoy time with your family since most of the time you’ll be thinking of that one little corner of your project you haven’t tackled. In all extremes, this can lead to you staying awake late at night in making sure everything is fine at work while everyone in your house looks at you bleary eyed.

One handy tip to remember is that if you have work problems discuss them with friends rather than family at home. You will surely manage personal and professional life efficiently.

Quality Home Time

Home time is your time. When you’re at home, your default mode is rest mode. Share anecdotes and laughs with the family. Laze around the couch and read a good book. Try out that amazing recipe you saw on T.V once or even catch up on some much needed Z’s. If you feel like family bonding time is lacking you can suggest activities like going out to eat at a favorite restaurant or watching a movie together.

Remember that home life is just as important. We naturally tend to see work as a challenge, an obstacle to be mounted and overcome for a reward. The logistics of work are remarkably simple, as is the whole system. It’s easy to take a very businesslike approach, calculating risk and reward. In the midst of aiming and building high, it’s almost easy to forget that your home is your foundation. If you’re not satisfied with the very base of your building, it doesn’t matter how high it rises – it’s only a matter of time before it crumbles. It’s a small realization that goes a long way in establishing that positive attitude that helps the working woman superhero on! 

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8 Tips To Follow In Career!

Most of the times, people are accountable for building their own careers.

Whether you are just starting, or you have many years of experience, the following career tips might help you progress your career.

1. Never Stop Learning

Learning should be your keyword. The world is continuously varying, and everybody is struggling to attain a good status in the world.

If you are firm that your existing skills are good enough then you have also measured that your present employment is good enough.

But if you are about to start a career in the near future, you should put in regular updates to your expertise and comprehension.

2. Be a Good Listener

Being a good listener makes you learn a lot. Listen to your superiors and your colleagues. You can gain experience from their experiences.

Ask about matters that interest you or things that trouble you, and let them advise you based on their experiences and listen carefully. Most individuals will be keen to be your gratis mentor.

3. Execute Your Current Job Effectively

Your present employment might be the best place to start your career with. Always remember, everything makes you learn something or the other.  Every experience is a learning experience – good or bad.

If you do your work fine and execute your tasks nicely then this is the best way to start a new career.

Talk to your manager about stuff you can do. Suggest enhancements. Propose your assistance when it is needed. Ask for help in return to build a better career. It is often likely to be right inside your own organization.

4. Build Your Network

Networking is the MOST important part to move forward in your profession. Plus, it is a fact thatmore than 50% of jobs are attained through contact networks.

If you have a good contact network, it is a good source to find out new opportunities and explore new trends.

Use some time creating new contacts, and don’t forget to keep up with the ones you already have.

One of the finest ways to attain serious information from your contacts is to frequently ask your them how they are, what are they up to, and what is new about their careers.

5. Identify Your Current Job

Make sure you don’t work with errands that you presume are important. This is waste of time and aptitude.

When you start a new job and you are not sure about what is the most important task, speak to your boss or manager about your priorities.

Often you will be astonished about the variations between what you presume, and what is actually important.

6. Identify Your Next Job

Prior to initiate planning your prospective career,be certain you have recognized your dream job– a job that you will enjoy doing; the work you are actually interested in.

Before building your future career, your aim ought to be identified.

Figure out what you actually want from your life and search ways to attain it. Always apply for the jobs you would love to do even if there is no vacancy. Go through organizational websites and randomly send in your CV. Keep searching and applying for the jobs that interest you online. You never you from where you might get the interview call.

7. Be Prepared

Don’t even loiter a moment. Revise your CV and continue to update it habitually.

Your dream job may roll up right before you any day. Be geared up to depict yourself as a valuable entity to anyone that will try to hire you.

If you don’t know how to write an impressive CV, or how to describe yourself, start learning it now. Also, build your professional profile on social websites like LinkedIn. Giving a linkedin link in your CV can also be a good idea.

8. Realize Your Dreams

Don’t let a hectic job slay your dreams. If you have elevated targets, put them into action now.

If you have plans about acquiring more edification, getting a better employment, starting your own company/business or something else, you should not deem your current job as a “waiting station”. Your every day work will get more and more demanding, you will be bogged down in the rat race, and you will incinerate your vigour. If you have this oomph, you should utilize it now, to apprehend your dreams!

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Body Language During An Interview

“Where body language conflicts with the words that are being said, the body language will usually be the more ‘truthful’ in the sense of revealing true feelings.”Glen Wilson

Did you know that body language makes up more than 93% of our communication?  In fact, if we decode a conversation it would be 7% words spoken, 38% tone of voice, volume, rate of speech, vocal pitch; and 55% facial expressions, hand gestures, stretches and exercises to improve your posture! The 93% is known not to reveal the exact concept of your message but it does expose underlying emotions, motives and feelings.

Of course, there may be an increase or decrease of the percentile provided above, especially if we compare introverted and extroverted individuals. Reading non-verbal cues isn’t just about broad strokes. The same gesture can indicate a number of different things depending on context.

BASIC ANATOMY OF READING BODY LANGUAGE

When you’re reading body language, your primary goal is to determine whether or not a person is comfortable in their current situation. Once you do this, it’s a process of using context and other cues to figure out the specifics. There are plenty of ways a person may indicate their comfort level, but here are a few of the most common traits:

Positive Body Language:

• Moving or leaning closer to you
• Relaxed, uncrossed limbs
• Long periods of eye contact
• Looking down and away out of shyness
• Genuine smiles

Negative Body Language:

• Moving or leaning away from you
• Crossed arms or legs
• Looking away to the side
• Feet pointed away from you, or towards and exit
• Rubbing/scratching their nose, eyes, or the back of their neck

A single cue can mean a myriad of things. For example, crossed arms falls under the category of negative body language and can suggest that a person is physically cold, closed off, or frustrated. It can even indicate that they’ve simply had too much to eat or perhaps habitually at ease. It’s necessary to pay attention to multiple behavioral cues as a single one can be misleading, simultaneously aiding you to indicate the comfort level in order to really understand why you need to look deeper. This means paying attention to other cues as well as their perspective situation.

LIAR LIAR!

One of the biggest advantages of learning to read body language well is being able to judge when someone is lying with a fair amount of accuracy. Your intuition is never going to be 100% precise, but with a little practice you can become more aware of when you’ve come across a rather mendacious individual.

Eye contact and lying go hand in hand as it is one of the most common known myths that when you lie, it is very difficult to maintain eye contact, especially with kids. Many people resort to overcompensating just to “prove” that they are not lying by making too much eye contact and holding it too long.

There is a common signal after a person tells a lie, which does requires breaking eye contact, even though they are trying to make eye contact, they unconsciously look down and away, then back at you again in a brief glimpse to see if you bought it, looking askance generally means the person is distrustful or unconvinced. People who look to the sides a lot may also mean they are nervous or distracted.

PHONY SMILES

This point is in continuation to detecting when someone is being untruthful. People are bad at offering a genuine smile when they’re lying. In fact, a genuine smile (often referred to as a ‘Duchenne smile’ apparently), is often said to be impossible to fake. This is why many of us end up with awkward family photos. We may think we look like we’re smiling, but to most anyone it looks like we’re faking it. This is because your smile is in your eyes, or, more specifically, the wrinkles around them. You display a few crow’s feet when you smile genuinely because your smile pushes up your cheeks which bunch up the skin near your eyes. It’s fairly hard to fake this. You need to feel some sort of genuine happy emotion at the time to do it, and when you’re uncomfortable this is next to impossible. This is why a non-genuine smile can be a helpful indicator of a lie in progress.

GESTURES

People with crossed arms are often taken as a sign of closing themselves to social influence. A rather two sided point as I had mentioned previously there are innumerablepeople who like to stay in such a posture out of comfort. Another common trait related to crossed arms portrays resistance, especially after a strong statement; on the other hand, if someone rests their arms behind their neck or head, they are open to what is being discussed or just laid back in general.

The hand placement is very important; hands on hips means waiting, impatient or just tired. If hands are closed or clenched this means irritation, anger, or nervousness. I had read somewhere that it’s a sign of immaturity to gesticulate with hands wide open with fingers apart whilst conversing. Excessive shrugging falls under the same category of a show of immaturity as well as negative body language.

The physically closer a person gets to you, the warmer they are thinking of you.

Overly tilted heads are either a potential sign of sympathy, or if a person smiles while tilting their head, they are being playful and maybe even flirting.

EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION IN A JOB INTERVIEW

Job interviews are a lot like first encounters or a date in the sense that you’re trying to convince another person, whom you don’t know, to like you. The key difference is that on a date you’re both meeting on equal ground. When you go into a job interview, however, the interviewer has most of the power and you have, essentially, none at all. This creates an environment where you’re going to likely be considerably more uncomfortable than the interviewer and give off negative vibes of body language. When interviewing for a job, you want to override any non-verbal communication that makes you seem closed off.

A charismatic beginning can make all the difference, as first impressions are hugely important in hiring decisions. A smile, pleasant handshake, warm greeting, and thepreviously mentioned positive body language will set the stage for a comfortable interview. Know what differentiates you and makes you special and remind yourself right before you walk into the room. Preparation breeds confidence, and it’ll be easier to display positive body language when you’re feeling good about yourself.

Eye contact is most important in a job interview than most other situations. If you have trouble meeting someone’s eyes, just look at their mouth. I find looking at someone’s nose easier because then you won’t have to lower your eyes which are required for when looking at someone’s mouth. You’ll also want to avoid blocking your own eyes in any way, as doing so can convey discomfort (among other negative feelings).

It also helps to appear to be a good listener, as you’ll be talking most of the time. When you ask your own questions, or your interviewer has something to tell you, eye contact is especially important. You can also convey that you’re in a “listening mode” by occasionally placing part of your hand over your mouth or resting two fingers under your chin. This helps indicate to others that you’re not going to talk and therefore paying attention. Good listeners prove to be those we can if not trust at least depend on.

In the end, your fate rests in the hands of another human being so there’s only so much you can do. They may not like your attire or prefer to hire someone younger or older. You never know what you’re going to run into, but you can at least try to tip the scales in your favor with the help of some positive body language.

Body language is a very powerful tool and shouldn’t be taken for granted. There are many other signals of body language that can mean more than just a simple movement or position. Whenever you find difficulty in communicating, take heed to Toba Beta’s words,“When speechless, let body language do the talk.”

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Tips to Deal With Everyday Depression

Depression is a state of mind which many of us have experienced, at one time or another. It is a period that can last from a day to decades, making happiness seem like a distant possibility that you are working with. In depression, you can never reach that happiness, but no matter how bleak the situation seems, there are always some things you should keep in mind:

Depression is a stage

 Think about all the times you have been depressed before this one, and all the times you have felt broken. You have always come out on top, no matter how bad those times got. You are here now, with all those pits of sadness in the past. Maybe you even look back at those times and laugh at how you felt, or think about solutions you could have applied. Someday, you’ll look back on this time too. It is good to remember that depression only comes in stages, and sooner or later you are bound to find your way out and restore the smile in your heart.

Take control of your life

Sometimes the reason that you are depressed is because the problem in your life is constantly on your mind, even though you realize that worrying about it won’t bring you any closer to solving it. As long as it stays in your thoughts, it is going to eat away at you. So one thing that can keep depression at bay is to constantly gain a sense of control over your life. Make a schedule and time, and stick to it. Decide all your needs that you have to address and methodically resolve them. You will also find that it is easier to work on the solutions of your problems if you are in a focused state of mind.

Go out more

And generally try to push your problems, temporarily, to the back of your head if depression gets too overwhelming. Even if you are not feeling ready for company, sometimes all you need is to visit a friend or family, or attend an event and let everyone else’s energy support you. If you are religiously inclined, attend a religious lecture. Or maybe you can pick a seminar on a topic that you find interesting. At the very least, go out and watch a movie with the family, or invite someone over for dinner. All these activities can help you temporarily improve your standing on life.

You are not alone

Finally, you have to realize that there is always someone in this world who cares about your happiness. Whether it is your family, your friends or even just some stranger, there is no shortage of good Samaritans in the world who would want you to share your problems. There are probably hundreds of people near you who are going through the exact same circumstances and know how you are feeling. Never be afraid to tell someone about your problems. Even if it feels like whining, unload your problems, talk about them. Words feel different in the air instead of in your mind, and make you realize that it is not as bad as you thought it was, and this is the first step to recovery.

Depression is a state where nobody wants to stay for long, and, in the end, the only one who can pull you out of it is you. Keep a positive attitude, undefeatable by time and make the world wonder what you are smiling about!

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How To Deal With Criticism On Your Work

If your boss or co-worker takes the time to give you a  feedback, looking in a bad-temper and defensive, you don’t really have to sit back and take it. If you disagree with the feedback and criticism you are getting, you can tell them that you have a different viewpoint. But it all depends on how you say it.

Here are some tips on how to stay positive and accept criticism without letting it get you down:

1. Accept the fact that you are not perfect.
2. Cross check your work; this will help you avoid silly mistakes.
3. Don’t take it personally; if your boss criticize your work, it doesn’t necessarily mean that he/she doesn’t like you.
4. Listen carefully to the comments and feedback.
5. Think what can you learn from this criticism.
6. Analyze and evaluate the feedback.
7. Don’t hold a grudge; it will affect your future work.
8. Remember everything happens for a reason; no hard work go unrewarded.

How To Be Tricky And Get Your Point Across Effectively Without Being Rude

Bad: Looking enraged

Good: “I’m glad you’re telling me this. However, from my perspective, I have been missing some deadlines because I had thought that projects x and y were the top priorities. Hence, I was focusing more on them. But am I looking at this wrong?”

Bad: Being offensive
Good: “I did not realize it was coming across that way, so I’m glad to know your perspective on this but from my point of view, it seems like (tell whatever your viewpoint is).”

Bad: Just replying with a curt “okay”. (This makes it look more like you give a damn to your boss and his feedback than actually processing it)
Good: Be responsive. Let your boss know what you’re going to do in response, even if it’s just to say that you need to give it some time or thought.

All in all, make sure whatever you say is in the right tone. Because tone matters a lot. One can misunderstand your intention if you have a snappy tone. Be glad about your boss’ feedback. Just take the positive side of the criticism or feedback. The bosses who take the time to give you an honest and candid feedback are the ones you want to work under. Always try to see the good side of everything. Don’t get demotivated by the criticism at work; constructive criticism is a key part of any job. 

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Learn Hoe To Make Work Life Simpler In 6 Steps

When your work starts getting on your nerves and quitting job is not an option by any chance, there comes a point where you cant seem to take the pain any more and the stress at work starts affecting your life outside office as well. Hence, here are 6 useful tips to make work life simpler in order to enjoy every moment of your life to the fullest.

1. Learn When to Say “No”

Never be over keen to help out your co-workers with their work. When you start accepting the work outside your job responsibilities, people eventually start assuming that they are part of your job description. Some of them may use tactics to put their workload on your as way to lessen their own, while others may do it inadvertently. Whatever is the case,it’s best to measure your workload before you decide to assist othersbecause the consequences can be tragic.

It is always better to focus on your work and complete your daily tasks first rather than helping out others and winding up in an unfavourable situation. However, it doesn’t mean that you have to be rude or mean with others, it’s just that you need to be systematic and professional with your work. Moreover, there is no harm in helping out others with their work until unless it’s not effecting your own work.

2. Learn to Accept Imperfection

Every job task has its own expectations on how comprehensively it has to be done. However, not every aspect of your job capacity has such strict prerequisite, and these are the areas you should show some flexibility. If you’re always aiming for excellence in everything you do, you’re going to burden yourself with your crushingly increasing stress in the long-run.

Sometimes, you unknowingly overlook a high-priority task simply by putting an extra effort and time into something that is less important. The crucial part is to learn to prioritize your efforts. Therefore, accepting imperfection for those things or tasks that are comparatively less important doesn’t mean that you have to sacrifice on your aim for perfection.

3. Set Your Own Rules

The word “rules” may sound rigid and strict to you, but certain things in life not only deserve to spend ‘just’ time on but ‘quality’ time. Just as you have to spend a chosen amount of time for work every day, we should keep time for other commitments as well; things like committing to yourself that you will hit the bed by 11, you will spend every Sunday or Saturday with your family, you will exercise at least once a week.

In a way, your set rules and commitments will help you maintain a balanced life that doesn’t have just work and work in it.

4. Be Convivial But Watch Out the Politics

Work takes up a considerable fraction of our time and energy, so it will be favourable to your welfare if you use up your time optimally. Get to know your co-workers well even outside work and you’ll have to face less hard time in the office. Socializing and interacting with your colleagues will make it easier for you to ask for help when you need it.

One important thing you need to keep in mind here is that you may inadvertently get involved in the office politics. As the time passes, you get comfortable with a certain person or clique more than the other. This may lead to office politics by forming or joining a group. However, you can always minimize the chances of it by making an attempt tointeract and mingle with everyone around. Remember to keep a good rapport with everyone without being taken for granted.

5. Reduce Job Stress By Taking Care of Yourself

Once you are out of the office, try to detach yourself from work as much as possible. Try to avoid distractions and complete your work within the office timing rather than bringing it to home with you.

If you have a lot of workload and it’s not possible for you to keep your work to office only then at least try to take a complete break from work during weekend or vacation. Enjoy your time with your friends and family to the fullest during weekend or a holiday because that is what more important in your life, work can be resumed later on.

6. Have Something to Look Forward To

Some of us may see work as a task that we drag out for five days a week. And for these people, time may seem to crawl by every second of the day and work can make their lives a living hell. Therefore, to abridge the pain of work, have something to look forward to at the end of the day, week, or even a month. Motivation or an incentive is necessary for every action in life, even if it’s just getting up from your seat to drink a glass of water, you need to have a stimulus (thirst) for that.

Try to link the reason why you are doing the work you abhor with what you look forward to. The reason could be that you are working because you need to meet your or your family’s needs and you are looking forward to take your family out this weekend or to buy things that are there in your wishlist!

And always remember that days will get easier on you when you have a reason as to why you’re holding on to your job, whether you are fed-up or not.

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